Friday, June 24, 2011

Screw the Economy, I have an AMG

Recently my friend Brandonamp said something about how I don't something in this space as often as he would like or something. Well, Brandonamp, here you are my friend, a little dish about what I've been up to.

There are two parts of George's life right now:

1) Getting ready for MBA school applications. Seriously. I have forgotten all of my maths. I took the practice test only to get the grade back and realize I was mentally handicapped in the math. The test is all about 7th grade math, which of course the fiance teaches to real live 7th graders. This makes me feel self conscious. She tries hard to be supportive, but how do you tell your fully grown fiance that her students know more of the material than he does without whipping out the "damn, you're stupid in the maths" card?

So every night I'm re-learning what some of you might remember from Mr. Wolf and Mr. Cumming's 7th and 8th grade math classes (I guess there's a little geometry in there too, but that's not important. Unless you're Ryan and want to shake your fist and yell "CASSIDY!")

The GMAT delights in giving me miniature math puzzles/riddles. Here's the kind of sample question I deal with all the time:

Jim, Mary, Jon, Joseph, and Jose all have sweaters. Mary has 2x as many sweaters as Jose, who has 3x as many as Jon. Jon has 75% as many as Joseph, who has 4x as many as Jim. Jim has x^2 + 2x - 1 sweaters for all answers where x>0. Which of the following statements is untrue?

I. Jon owns greater than 3 sweaters, but less than 5.
II. Jim owns more sweaters than Mary.
III. Jose has fewer shirts than Jim.

A) I only
B) II only
C) III only
D) I and II but not III
E) I and III but not II
F) I, II, and III
G) None of the above

Yeah, it's pretty silly stuff. You get to wondering why so many multi-ethnic people can be compared by their sweater count, and why someone couldn't just lay out all the damn sweaters and I don't know, count them.

So yeah, I do that a lot.

2) I search for jobs and apartments. Well, I was searching for apartments up until a few days ago when our first choice offered to let us sign a lease. Hooray! So I'll be living it up in a pretty swank pad for the remainder of 2011. It's got 2 decks. I'm on a deck muthafucka', don't you ever forget it!

The job search has been less successful. I'm starting to realize that most people in their twenties move to a place and then try to find work. And apparently unless you are a programmer, there are no jobs available. Seriously. Go out and try to find a job in any field that isn't programming. Ooops, you just sent out 150 applications and got one offer for a telemarketing position at Skeazeway Inc. Yep, that's what happens.

But all is not lost, you see, I have decided to acquire a new AMG S63. I got the custom red custom hatchback version with DTRLs, manual gearbox, and low profile tires. No body kit or nothing, and a big 1300cc under the hood. I just went out and took a photo for you guys so you can see it:


As you can see, it looks a little different than the showroom shots:

But it's got the AMG badges on it, and that's what counts:



So yeah, that's basically what I'm doing nowadays. When we finally move into the sweet new digs, I'll share pictures of those. I need to get a new tiny camera before that though. I sold my big honkin DSLR since I never really used it, and now I need to figure out a replacement that can fit comfortably in my ear canal or something.

7 comments:

  1. Jim's sweater count doesn't make any sense, unless he wears them until they have even more holes than my refugee shirts.

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  2. http://fooplot.com/

    x^2 + 2x - 1
    4(x^2 + 2x - 1)
    .75*4(x^2 + 2x - 1)
    3*.75*4(x^2 + 2x - 1)
    2*3*.75*4(x^2 + 2x - 1)

    Once you turn the mishmash of words and meaningless sweaters into clean equations and plot them, it becomes clear that F) I, II, and III are untrue.

    Doing that by hand is less fun, but doable since it's just a parabola with modified slopes. You ought to at least have a graphing calculator though, if they are making you do geometry problems.

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  3. They live in Crazy Math Universe, where diet soda has (10(x^3))/(x^(6sin(30))) calories (for all non-zero values of x.)

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  4. Your AMG S63 is really the coolest version I've seen. I have one in white, but red is cuter.

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  5. Physicists are taught to think the exact opposite of that Equation. My Test would have read:

    Given that all sweaters have real and positive values, predict the number of possible sweaters that Jon, Jim and Jose have using the following data. Keep in mind the number of sweaters that Mary and Joseph have are finite and whole.

    I would be lying if I said I didn't like these things.

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  6. Relevant? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSto4JNzYYo

    ReplyDelete